A Lesson I Learnt Too Late
After more than five decades of public service and leadership, if someone were to ask me what life has taught me, my answer would not be about success, awards, or positions.
It would be about people.
There is an old saying:
“Those who get used by others seldom realize it, but those who use others know exactly what they are doing.”
For many years, I did not fully understand these words. Experience became my teacher.
Like countless volunteers, I believed that loyalty was one of the highest virtues. If a leader sought my support, I stood by him. If an organisation needed me, I gave my time. If there was a difficult task to be done, I accepted it without asking, “What is in it for me?”
I believed that this was leadership.
Over time, however, I discovered an important distinction.
Loyalty to values is noble. Loyalty to personalities can be dangerous.
Many sincere people are persuaded in the name of loyalty. They are told that the cause is greater than the individual, that unity is paramount, and that sacrifice is expected of them. They step forward with conviction, believing they are serving a larger purpose.
The work gets done.
The objective is achieved.
The leaders are applauded.
But sometimes those who fought the battle are left to carry the consequences alone.
Relationships become strained. Misunderstandings arise. Friendships are lost. And when, one day, those very loyal individuals need support, they occasionally discover that loyalty was expected from them but not always returned to them.
That realization is painful.
Yet today, when I look back, I do not feel anger.
I feel gratitude.
Because every disappointment became a teacher.
Every setback helped me understand that character is more important than position, principles more enduring than personalities, and integrity far more valuable than influence.
If I have one message for young leaders, it is this:
Never stop being loyal—but first decide what deserves your loyalty.
Be loyal to truth.
Be loyal to ethics.
Be loyal to fairness.
Be loyal to your conscience.
People may change with circumstances. Positions come and go. Friendships may strengthen or weaken with time. But values never betray us.
Looking back, I have no regrets about serving people. If I had to live my life again, I would still choose service over self-interest.
The only difference is that I would be wiser.
I would ask myself one simple question before taking any stand:
“Am I defending a principle… or merely protecting a personality?”
That single question has the power to save years of disappointment.
Life has convinced me that kindness should never disappear, generosity should never diminish, and faith in humanity should never be lost.
But kindness must walk hand in hand with wisdom.
Generosity must be guided by discernment.
And loyalty must always bow before ethics.
For in the end, positions are forgotten.
Power fades.
Applause becomes silence.
But a life lived with honesty, integrity, and a clear conscience remains its own greatest reward.
Ashok Mahajan
SMILE SERVE SACRIFICE SATISFY